Talking NFL

In Step 1, we reviewed the top 6 studs from the ‘06 season.  Now it’s time to predict who the big guns will be in this year’s campaign…

Before we begin, I want to reitirate my definition of a STUD (especially if T-Bone is still trolling around out there…he’s a tad slow…):  A fantasy stud to me is not just a player who puts up a ton of points; it’s a player (or defense) whose point total surpasses his nearest competitor at that position by a wide margin.  That’s why I highlighted both the Ravens and Bears defenses, but no tight ends from last year.  The # 3 defense (the Vikings) was a whopping 59 points below the Ravens, while the difference in scoring between the top four tight-ends in the league was only 18 points.

So we’re doing this stud review (guh…sounds like I’m at Chippendale’s) by position, nominating as many players at each position that I feel will blow away the rest of the pack.  Ready?  Good - on we go!

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Boston.com’s Mike Reiss is reporting that the Pats have agreed to a one year contract with perennial fan favorite Troy Brown.  Terms of the deal have yet to be disclosed.

Great news!  Now, exactly where Troy fits on the New England depth chart (if anywhere) remains to be seen.

As Reiss points out, the Pats now have a lucky 13 wide receivers on the roster.   In addition, Wes Welker is all ready penciled in as the ‘new’ Troy Brown, and should probably be Brady’s key 3rd down receiver as well as the team’s primary kick returner.

So where exactly does Brown fit in?  Many have described him as the ultimate ’sand lot’ player, doing whatever the teams asks of him and playing any position as needed.  So don’t be surprised if you see the 36 year old in a special teams role, or even subbing in again at cornerback where he’s played now in multiple seasons.  

(Those DB skills served him well when he stripped San Diego free safety Marlon McCree of the football during last year’s divisional playoff. Without that play, the Patriots would not have comeback to beat the Chargers & advance to the AFC Championship Game…)

The timing of this announcement couldn’t be more perfect, because in nearly every way (dedication to the team, unselfishness, willingness to do what’s asked of him), Troy Brown is the complete opposite of He Who Won’t Be Named Here.

Congrats, Troy, and welcome back!!

New England Patriots, Troy Brown, resigned

Each Monday (like most football fans) I scour the web for NFL news, tips and gossip.  Yesterday, the internets was all abuzz with breaking news about the all glorious T.O.  What was the big story?  Something about him attending a white wedding dressed in black.

Right after reading it, I realized that I was all ready completely sick of him.

I don’t need (or want) to go into the endless soap opera that was Terrell’s 2006 campaign.  I’ve touched on it before.  Suffice to say, we can expect that this weekend’s events signify the official kick-off to this year’s buffoonery.  And starting tomorrow, I refuse to be a part of it.

Don’t worry, constant reader; you’ll still have about 843 sports related sites from where you can get your T.O. fix.  In fact, here’s a prediction for this season’s festivities:

Week 2:  Terrell complains he’s not getting the ball enough.
Week 5:  Terrell has minor breakdown.  Requests trade.
Week 7:  Terrell calls new coach Wade Phillips “Pork Chop”.  Claims it’s endearing.
Week 9:  Terrell questions Tony Romo’s arm strength.  And taste in rock star girlfriends.
Week 11: Terrell has massive breakdown.  Fires agent, hires Dr. Phil.
Week 14: Terrell drops 2 TD passes.  Complains that there is no love in Romo’s throws, so he doesn’t feel a connection to the ball.
Week 17: Terrell costs Cowboys a playoff berth.  In post game interview, claims he is distraught. Goes to Playboy Mansion immediately afterwards for guest spot on “The Girls Next Door”.

T.O. is an over-rated media whore who might as well have a t-shirt that reads “Pay Attention to Me!”  No thanks; I wash my hands of that prima dona.  If this were a live show, I’d give him the Mika Brzezinski treatment.

Well, at least T.O. gets in the end zone.  Has anyone figured out what Paris does?

Terrell Owens, media ban, no divas, Dallas Cowboys, no, I still hate Peyton Manning more

Today we begin the 2007 season preview, and I pose the above question not simply because I’m an obnoxious Patriots fan (and proud of it!), but because that’s how every football expert out there appears to be thinking. Take a look for yourselves at these predictions for Super Bowl XLII (care of USA Today):

- Athlon Sports: Patriots over Cowboys

- Street & Smith’s: Patriots over Saints

Even those smart-asses over at Kissing Suzy Colber seem to be drinking the red, white & blue kool-aid (although I detect just a trace of sarcasm there…).

The consensus seems to be that the off-season acquisitions of Adalius Thomas, Wes Welker, Donte Stallworth, and of course, Randy Moss, should be enough to push Belichick, Brady & company past their AFC Title game appearance last year, and onto their 4th title in seven years. I feel that this is a dangerous assumption to make. Consider:

- Assumed success in free agency doesn’t necessarily translate to success on the field. See: Washington Redskins.
- The Patriots still have some weaknesses that we not fully addressed in the offseason.
- The possible holdout of Asante Samuel would leave a rather large hole in the secondary.
- Brady’s combined duties as father to Ms. Moynahan’s offspring and bo to a high maintenance supermodel will affect his performances on Sundays (God, I hope that just stays a joke…).

Finally, let’s remember that the Patriots won their first Super Bowl in 2001, when everyone and their mother was predicting that the Rams would win it all. You just never know what’s going to happen once the season starts…

Of course, that’s not going to prevent me from making some wild assumptions and comically bad predictions for all 32 teams! We’ll begin this week, with team breakdowns division-by-division. We’ll cap things off with a full playoff prediction, culminating with the Super Bowl champion.

And by the way, I’m not picking the Patriots to win it all. (See? Not all Pats fan are obnoxious homers…)

Anyways, it should be fun (or at least fun to laugh at in December), so stay tuned!

NFL Preview, 2007, Regular Season, Predictions, Prognostications, Throwing a Dart at the Wall

Today we give thanks to this great American holiday by providing a patriotic salute to the lovely ladies that grace the sidelines of the NFL. Enjoy!

(and thanks to reader Dennis who kindly reminded me that I had promised said cheerleader extravaganza two weeks ago…bless you and your desperate need for cheerleader pics!)

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This past week, the football world was stunned by the NFL’s decision to shut down NFL Europe. I personally wept for seconds, then continued to eat my cheeseburger…

Ironically, the league had finally gotten a decent following, with nearly 50,000 fans attending last week’s World Bowl championship in Frankfurt. Granted, 5 out of the 6 teams were based in Germany (stunning surprise that a country famous for sausage & beer would get hooked on the pigskin. It’s like they were the NFC Central with Lederhosen…).

Anyways, this basically means that the NFL JV squad (i.e. scrubs) will now have to choose between freezing their butts off in Canada, or slamming them into the side of a hockey rink, if John Elway gets his way…

die Entsetzen!

NFL Europe, folding, adios muchachos, I didn’t even find out until yesterday